Have you ever felt the need to have a vacation from your
vacation? I love both of my girls with
all my heart, but traveling with a 3 year old and an 8 month old is really a
lot of work. It took a lot of patience,
compassion, caffeine, and a Seagram’s Black Cherry Fizz to come out on the
other side of this trip with my sanity still intact.
But survive we did, and while on vacation I started reading
a book called The 7 Habits of HighlyEffective People, by Stephen Covey.
Lately I’ve seen a lot about The 7 Habits of Happy Kids on Pinterest and
in various blogs, and decided to do a little investigating. After some research, I determined that
this was something worth trying in my classroom. What I like about the concept, is that you
are helping kids establish habits that they can carry with them throughout the
rest of their life, as opposed to arbitrary classroom rules that vary from
teacher to teacher. So, in lieu of a
list of “rules” this year, I am establishing these 7 habits as my expectations
of my students.
On one of the blogs, a teacher suggested reading the
grown-up version of the book first, which was the first title that I
mentioned. Which makes sense, because in
order to effectively teach anything, you need to arm yourself with a deep understanding
of your topic. With that in mind, I
bought the book and dove in headfirst.
It didn’t take me too long to realize that I’d plunged into
not just a set of 7 habits, but also an entire shift in one’s outlook and
attitude towards life. Essentially,
Covey sets out to help you create a paradigm shift in the way you approach
everything that you do. He explains that
it is essential to establish a focus on values, and work on correcting our own
flaws, instead of blaming everything and everyone else for our problems.
Oh snap.
And this was just in the introduction.
So I decided that the best way to approach the reading of
this book would be to focus on two key points: first, how can I apply this to
my own life, because as Covey points out, you have to fix yourself first; and
two, how can I help my students truly understand and commit to these 7 habits.
Habit 1 is entitled “Be Proactive.” Keeping in mind the two key points I’m
focusing on, I am providing a list of what I personally believe are the
highlights of this habit. These are the
pieces that I believe are necessary to complete this first puzzle.
1. Proactivity means taking initiative.
2. We are responsible for our own lives.
3. Our behavior is a function of our decisions, not
our conditions.
4. Proactive people are driven by values. Reactive people are driven by feelings.
5. Responsibility = response ability, the ability
to choose our response to what happens to us.
6. Be part of the solution, not the problem.
7. Language is an indicator of the degree to which
we see ourselves as proactive people.
The language of reactive people absolves them of responsibility. For example, “I have to do that.” “I must.”
“I can’t.” “There’s nothing I can
do.” Proactive language is about
choosing our response. “I choose.” I will.”
“I control my own feelings.” “How
can we fix this?”
8. Focus your time and energy on things you can
influence.
9. The proactive approach to a mistake is to
acknowledge it instantly, correct and learn form it.
10. Make
and keep commitments.
I have to be perfectly honest, I felt very humbled as I read
this first habit, and realized that I am soooo often guilty of blaming others or external forces for the problems that I am facing. The
idea of taking responsibility for my response to what happens to me, by
focusing only on what I can control, and work on solutions instead of wallowing
in self-pity is all very appealing to me.
I am the first to admit that as a teacher, I sometimes get sick of being
told what to do (ironic, isn't it?). After all, I am told what
curriculum to teach. I’m told what
standards third graders are expected to master, I’m told I have to give a state
reading and state math test, I’m told I need a reading endorsement to teach at
risk third grade readers, I’m told I have to write SLO’s, I’m told I have to
move to another building, and on and on and on.
And none of it seems very fair, and some of it even seems insulting. Sometimes I find myself wondering why I spent
so much money getting a bachelor’s and master’s degree to just be told what to
do. But now I understand that these are
things outside of my circle of influence.
It’s within what Covey would call my circle of concern, but these are
circumstances I can’t change. What I can
change is my response to them. I can be
proactive and focus my time and energy on the parts of these circumstances that
I can influence.
Next up, Habit 2: Begin with the End in Mind. That sounds like something Yoda would say...
